Moving Again ... sigh

OK, so Bear is now 10 weeks old, absolutely huge, and just as full of tricks as he was at 4 weeks, then 6 weeks, and so on ... just larger and able to bite much harder and jump higher and run faster ... Although, on the up side, I have managed to teach him to sit before he eats, shake a paw, jump up, lie down and roll over - which he learned pretty damn fast. It diesn't even take him a day to learn something, he seems to know within minutes what you want him to - from there it is just a matter of if he feels like doing it and how big the rewards are!

So quite a bit has happened lately. Most importantly, we have to move from our beautiful big house by the sea and no doubt get a house like everyone else ... boring! I apologise for being a snob but we really like our house and we really don't want to move! The people that own the house are moving back to Swakop from Windhoek and so we are officially homeless as of the 1st December. Of all the times, this is what annoys us. It is never easy to find houses to rent in Swakop, much less in December, as the entire country converges on Swakopmund for their summer holidays.

I have been to every agent in town, and we looked at 2 houses out of 15 agents. One was at the golf course out of town and tiny, with no garden for the animals either, the other was a 3-storey in Long Beach and nowhere near as impressive as we had hoped to make us move all that way out of town. From there I found another one through Patricia that we went to look at, and yes it is ok, but nothing great, very boring, very old-fashioned and closed-in, when I am now so used to this house with its big open spaces and wide windows.

We are waiting on one more house to look at, and am praying that the agents will come back to us today. I have been to see them twice and phoned and emailed so apparently we are on the top of the list, but who knows, we can only wait and see. The problem with this last house, is that it is unfurnished, which means we have to start buying our own furniture, and due to us paying off our debt and the recent Doctors bills that we have had, this might be a little difficult, so expect to see an empty house ...

Otherwise, I really am not sure where we are going to go or what to do. I have started packing - glorious job - but that should soon be done as we don't have a lot of things really. Enough to have to pack more than our clothes lol but not enough sadly to need a truck!

Marley and Me

Was really a great book and I enjoyed it thoroughly. I even blogged about it, but I have to say, I really think that I may have more trouble on my hands John Grogan had with Marley. Snort at me all you like ...

Last week Monday Bear had his first set of shots, at 6 weeks and one day old. Not only did he get dewormed, but I also had to explain to the vet that his penis didn't look quite right - it seems that was the start of it all. So yes, he has an infection down there and had to endure the embarressment of being held down and having a load of antibiotics injected right up it!! I have never heard of a puppy having an infection down there; how on earth it happens I do not know.

So on a daily basis he lies on my feet and chews everything in sight - this is really quite cute. He removes my slippers from my feet and drags them off to his bed to chew in peace. If I refuse to allow him to chew my slippers he will then try his hardest to chew my feet to pieces for as long as I can stand his needle-sharp teeth to pierce my skin.

If that doesn't work, he will chew whatever trousers I am wearing, and walking becomes a problem when you have a Husky hanging off your leg and are at risk of ripping through your clothing. He also miscalculates from time to time and smacks into the back of my leg, forcing a little "whumph" out of him. He sits down, shakes his head, and goes right back at it. The reason why I am not disciplining him for chewing my legs as I am walking is that I am hoping that ignoring it and having him run into my legs will eventually stop him - guess what? It's not working. He does it twenty times a day.

He destroyed my lettuce bed, he steals laundry and drags it around the house (slightly embaressing when you have guests and he strolls out with my knickers in his jaws, ever so proud), he chews the furniture and me, my shoes, the cushions and whatever else he can get his teeth into even though he has numerous toys and bones lying everywhere. He chases the cats everytime they move, and won't let you clean as it is just WAY too much fun to chase the mop or broom (which he has destroyed as well btw).

We took him to dog-training (agility) the Saturday after his shots, just to find out where we could go for puppy-training, only to have Bear try and hump every other dogs leg that he could reach! He had absolutely no manners at all, and clearly didn't mind if they were male or female either.

Even at one day short of 7 weeks, the "dog whisperer" of this training session advised us that he was going to be problematic to say the least ...

I don't want to grow up and have kids ...

Said my four year old nephew, Aaron, whilst actually throwing a tantrum about it, bless his little heart. This came via the IM chat service that my Mother and I use to communicate, and had me laughing my head off. I have to admit, I agree with him fully! I am just not allowed to throw a tantrum about it ....

And honestly, going along the kids line - Bear is frigging hard work. What the hell am I going to do with kids?? I can't exactly lock them in the garage and leave them there whilst I go out and do everything that I have to do, or chuck them in the back of the car and leave them to hang their tongue out the window.

Bear is high maintenance, and it seems that in his little Husky world, I am not the Alpha as I had planned to be. Pio has taken that role. Man am I pissed! How did this happen? He chews me to death, I look like I am self-harming because my hands are covered in little bleeding scratches from his amazingly sharp teeth. I swear one of these nights I am going to lose a mouthfull of hair to him and have to walk around with a bald patch, the size depending on how much he could fit into his mouth without me noticing, before bailing full speed in the opposite direction with it all in his mouth. I am also going to lose a large number of clothes and shoes as he takes great delight in trying to rip them apart, and in a few weeks time, he is going to have the jaws to do it!

Last night, after Pio and Gustav kept me up until gone 3am the previous morning - this resulting in a migraine - and then I had to go to work, got home early as I decided to finish there permanently, and then got stuck into cleaning the house. I didn't sleep at all, and so last night I bombed out not long after 9pm. I slept dead, so heaven only knows how Bear abused me during the night as I think you could have dropped a nuke next to me and I wouldn't have known it. I haven't looked in the mirror yet so am not sure if I am missing an ear or am covered in teeth marks, but will find out soon enough. 

I woke up just before 7am, only for him to twig that I was awake, and instantly begin chewing me, whilst Nala gazed at me soulfully from beneath the chair, too scared to come out, and Zazu began killing the furniture. They know that this always wakes me and then results in them getting fed - the ultimate aim of the game for them. Whilst I lay there wanting desperately to go back to sleep, trying to hide from Bear's razor teeth, thinking that I needed to take him out for a pee ...

He jumped off the bed, emptied his bladder on the tiles that I spent almost the entire day yesterday scrubbing by hand, walked through it, and jumped back into bed with me leaving little pee pawprints across my clean sheets ... Typical, and so served me right for not jumping up and taking him outside.He must have held it all night bless him - it was the hugest pee you have ever seen out of something so small - I think his bladder had taken over his stomach as I really don't understand where all that liquid came from.

Well, that did the trick, I was up and feeding them all of 1 minute later, and taking them all outside with a cup of coffee to play in the garden.

OK, so Bear was officially easier to train than a child. As long as we stick to routine, he does his number two's outside on the grass, and is so good about it whenever we go out there he at least tries to do one even if he doesn't need to. And a lot quicker - three days of routine and he was fine, no more messing inside until yesterday, when he went twice on the floor. Why??? He was being so good! So, with that in mind, now that I am home again, it doesn't seem as if pee-training will take long either.

So yes, officially easier than a child, but hard enough to make me 100% positive that I do not want a child for a very, very long time yet. I mean seriously, one night of fun, 9 months of being fat, and eighteen years of hell before you can get rid of them temporarily, and hope that they don't continue to sponge off you and make your life difficult for the rest of your life ... oh yeah, that sounds like so much fun, I want to get started right now ... Ha bloody ha!

Give me animals any day of the week.

Bear

On Monday the 7th September, we got to collect our 4-week-old Husky pup. Yes, we know he was too young to be separated from his mother, but she had stopped feeding them and they were on solids.

The first night home, we got a blanket for him and put it down in the kitchen while we were making dinner, and he climbed right on and went to sleep. That blanket is now his bed and he knows it - apart from sleeping on the bed in the TV room little monster!

So because I am working at the moment, he stays in the garage during the day with a hot water bottle, water and food and plenty of toys - not that he chews them, he waits til I get home and chews me! I come home at lunch to let him out and feed him, and get greeted by him howling his tiny little head off in excitement, at lunch and again in the afternoons when I get home. Thursday was the first day he didn't chunk the house down and just greeted me with little barks of excitement. It seems he is already getting used to his days in the garage.

I hate locking him in, he is tiny and he must get very lonely, but he seems to be coping quite well and doesn't seem to be nervous or have developed any insecurities from being left alone for so long - YET. However, I will be finishing work at the end of this week so he will no longer be alone - only 5 days to go!!

We sleep downstairs with him every night, or Pio stays downstairs with him and I sleep upstairs with the cats as they have serious issues with him still. It gets a little better every day - I think they are still suffering from the effects of Clara taking a piece out of them and are very nervous, but every day they come a little closer and every day they realise he isn't chasing them.

Last night was so cute - we took Bear out quite late as he had an upset tummy and we wanted him to go outside and not inside, and we sat in the front garden with all three of them. I sprayed catnip all over the cats favorite log, and that did it for Nala - considering she refuses to go near him or even go downstairs mostly when he is around - she lay on her log and they even touched noses. After the effects of the catnip wore off she was back to her moody little self, but it was a start.

Zazu on the other hand seemed to think Bear is to be played with and spent a long while hiding and running from him, so they chased each other around whilst never actually coming into contact, but Zazu seemed to enjoy it thoroughly. I tried again this morning, but Bear seems to like his home comforts and wasn't even outside for 5 minutes before running back inside.

So I cuddled up to my cats all night whilst Bear chewed Pio's hair and kept him awake all night ... LOL. It seems though that Bear is already pushing his little Alpha boundaries - he is extremely vicious towards me (a result of teasing him whilst playing and winding him up) and he already seems to think that is the norm - a bad habit learnt in 5 minutes will take a month to break it seems ...

He knows where his bed is and if he is tired and my feet aren't available to lie on then he will run off to his bed in the garage and plonk himself down and go to sleep quite peacefully, so one good lesson learned. He also seems more attached to me - I assume because I am home more often and I feed him - and if I am around then he is with me permanently and would rather lie on the cold floor at my feet than get into bed with Pio :-)

We got the details of a dog trainer as well, so once he has had his shots and is able to go out in public then he will be going for training and we will find out just how bright he is! Let's hope that we aren't disappointed.

Procrastination

I have decided that I am really procrastinating at the moment. Nothing in life has really changed since the 21st June when I last posted ... Even though I keep telling myself to post something EVERY day, even if it is two lines, post it. Start writing a column, study, do something interesting ... but here I sit still procrastinating ...

I may have a job as well, not that I am meant to work as I don't have a visa yet, but hey. As usual it has come along at the completely incorrect time as I found a Husky pup that I want to get, and as far as I am concerned, I cannot get a puppy and leave it at home all day. The job is at Riaan's offices, so just like all the other jobs I am sure will pay rubbish and won't make a massive difference to my life, but I can't really complain.

So my Husky puppy, if I don't get a job then I can get him, but if I do have to take this waste-of-time job, then I will not be able to get him. Everywhere on the internet it says do not leave Husky's alone, they will destroy the house. They like company and they have to be busy and require training from the word go. Otherwise they will be totally uncontrollable and I really do not want that to happen, so I guess we will just have to wait and see.

If we get him, we have decided that his name will be Bear :-) Just really like that name, or Shanook, but more likely Bear for some random reason. I like it.

Other than that, nothing interesting going on. Am sick of the Gustav v Janine story, they must all piss off. Soritha moves today so after two weeks of helping her pack, she is finally off today. So I am home alone again for a time and intend to be creative during my time off as I will surely soon be working!

Nala and Zazu are still as mad as always and causing trouble and eating me out of house and home. Nothing changes there either!

Right, had best go and do something and be creative and enjoy my last time off ...

Why ...

Am I up and have been since like half past six ...

It is Sunday morning! Very early on a Sunday morning! I think there is something wrong in my brain as first thing in the morning as I get up so early I have about two hours of energy and get loads done, and then shortly after lose all enthusiasm and energy, and spend the rest of the day wanting to go back to sleep. I will then pass out at any time from 7 or 8 onwards if I am in the front of the TV, so try avoid that lol. I think there is something wrong with me. No one should be this tired permanently or sleep as much!

As usual, Swakop being what it is, it is overcast, cloudy, and slightly chilly although thankfully not foggy. Being a Sunday morning it is still quiet in and around, as it seems I am the only idiot that is up at this time. Even the sea is calm.

Christine was meant to be off the lodge yesterday, but thanks to her awesome courage and guts, dragged the entire village and the Women's Rights people to the Governor's office and demanded help - he then arranged an emergency meeting with the Chief on Friday and according to both he and the Land Board she was not to leave the lodge. So Joe moved in on Saturday, and she stayed. We did find out yesterday though that the Governor didn't make it to the Chief, so will hopefully be there on Monday to resolve this. Monday was the meeting where Joe and Christine should have resolved their issue of compensation, but as Joe wants the place for free he has no intention of paying anything for it.

Anyway, the joys of that place. It will be sad if it is lost though. Other than that, I will get another application for a visa this week if I can get the paperwork together - what a drama, am so sick of it. Not worth the issues I swear.

Hippo Lodge

I have decided today that I will start a new blog about the lodge and how things progress there as it could be fascinating following this story. I will also ask Christine if she can get me all the details, as much as she remembers from as far back as possible regarding the court cases and all other details, and get this down in writing.

The latest development there is that Joe has bribed the Chief, posted signs all over the lodge saying Do Not Trespass, and stolen the telephone so Chris has no contact with the outside world. It is unbelievable how he has talked his way through the Chief's, clearly by paying them N$10,000.00 per month and an additional N$120,000.00 per year. I bet he will now pull a Du Toit and start paying the locals off to harass Chris and scare her away. As it is she has apparently been given a week to get off the land. It grates how they expect her to do that in a week. 20 years of living there and that is what you get for it.

It seems that there is no loyalty in their souls for the family that has been there for 20 years - Chris told Pio yesterday that it was 20 years ago yesterday that Henry moved to the lodge. It is heart-breaking that after all this time, after fighting non-stop for all of those years, that everything will be lost because of this one person that has walked in and ripped away their life. And the worst thing is, there is nothing that can be done about it. Nothing because if they do something, they will get sued, and there is no money left. They are seriously in debt, there is just nothing left. All the fight is gone.

Right, so anyway, that is my goal, to write write and write hopefully, if I can get the information out of Chris, and document this all. Everyone keeps saying that it would make a great book - well maybe it will. We have to get it down first. :-)

Friends

My last post was a complete rant about the stupidity of my boyfriend and life. I never even finished it as it just got more ridiculous from there on in. Then, life threw me another curve ball, which I attempted to duck, miscalculated completely it seems, and got smacked in the face.

It turns out that my boyfriend, the one that I gave up my life, friends, family, car, and boys for, took it on himself to cheat on me whilst I was planning to move here. So whilst I was sitting at home planning my move and saving every possible cent that I had to my name, packing and handing in my notice, he was out partying and sticking his tongue down her throat.

Then, after my arrival, when I heard about this, I confronted him with it only to have him lie to me. Seven months later I hear it again and confront him again, only to hear another lie, so eventually approached the girl in question. The maddening thing is, is that this was my so-called friend. She had been welcome in my house, had partied with us, and was (apparently) a good friend. Haven't I been made the fool.

I am sitting here in front of my laptop, debating life. The story gets even more sordid though. Not only did she become my friend, but my other so-called friend told her to not tell me about it as I would be upset - oh gee, I wonder why I would be upset. Over nothing really. My other friend apparently couldn't say whether the deed had happened or not, only that she suspected. So she suspects something but makes sure that the girl in question does NOT tell me anything - so she must have known logically.

Then, my other friends husband, whom I recently decided to view as a friend, when asked the question, mentioned that night as well but said that he wasn't there, which I today found out is a lie as well. He was there and must have known apparently. Gee, who needs liars when you have all these friends around.

This just makes me wonder sadly. I am the type of friend that will fight for you, that will defend you, that will look after you, that will do anything for you. Apparently no one else has these values (I lie, Vicky does) so where does friendship go from here? And honestly, who the f'ing hell can be trusted? I have never done anything to any of these people. Yes, I am a bolshy bitch that says what I feel when I feel it. I am opinionated and will stand up fiercely for whatever I feel is right. It seems that has made me some enemies in this place.

Clearly I do not fit in with the normal, two-faced, lying crowd. But does that mean that I am never going to have any friends in this place? And if you can't trust the people closest to you then who the hell can you trust? Should my "friends" have told me about it or not? I think that they should have. I gave up everything for this man. For nothing it seems.

I am in the process of evaluating my life and trying to figure out what I want. I no longer know how I feel about anything. I couldn't tell you how I feel about my friends or my boyfriend. I don't know whether I will stay here or leave. And if I leave, where do I go?

Hell

The last week has been something else entirely. I guess you don't realise how good your life is until something is taken away and then you really have to sit back and evaluate things. I have had to do a lot of evaluation this week and I still do not know where I stand, so the war on the inside continues!

Last Friday was OUR birthday. It turns out that for Pio this seemed to be an issue all of a sudden. I had been sick with bronchitis as I previously said, so for me who was still feeling shit, I didn't want to do a lot as I was paranoid about smoking at whilst having bronchitis as it then turns to pneumonia, and the doctor had warned me of this already. Anyway, on the good side, my Mom sent me a massive bunch of roses that are still alive a week later!! Yay! I got Pio a pair of shoes and he got me 3 red roses and an IOU to go to a lodge one day when we have money.

It was on Friday that I finally finished the course of antibiotics and steroids that I had been given, and came off the cough mixture and nasal spray blah blah blah. Unfortunately I didn't feel any better and so I thought I should get the doctor out of the way on Friday afternoon instead of having to get up on Saturday morning. The only appointment I could get was 5pm, which wasn't ideal, but I thought it would take ten minutes. Unfortunately Dr Bierman must have been running really late as we sat waiting for an hour.

By the time I saw him it was 6pm, and then after listening to my chest again he referred me for x-rays which he said had to be done the following day and brought straight back to him. That being Saturday morning. So we went out for dinner, Pio had by now said what an inconvenience it was to have our birthday on the same day, which upset me really, because he wanted to do something big and I was still too sick and didn't want to drink as then I would smoke. So we went for dinner AFTER me telling him to go out with his friends if he was going to be that way. I would then go home as I didn't want to make myself more sick.

So of course he was the perfect boyfriend and came with me to dinner and was great all night. Hope rang me as well so got to chat to her for a while which was fantastic. Pio was also on and off the phone with his mother etc etc. We got home after 9pm and pretty much went straight to bed.

Saturday we were just at home and I wanted to go to the SPCA in Walvis - this as a follow up from meeting Clara here and wanting a dog. So he eventually agreed and we took a drive through. It was absolutely heart-breaking to see all those animals there, I kept swallowing tears. We drove back mostly along the beach, seeing 4 dead sea-turtles on the stretch between Long Beach and Swakop, which broke my heart even more so had to swallow more tears!! Back in town we decided to stop at WurstBude for a pizza which we did, it was great, and whilst there I told Pio to invite Gustav and Janine to come and sit with us in the sun and have a drink. Seems that was my fatal mistake. Apparently there was a Motorcross on the go and they were there.

The tricky bit was, I apparently had to be home at 4 to speak to my Mom who was ringing with a surprise, but the camera on the webcam hadn't been working for a week and Pio knew it. We got home at 2:36pm and he had to get that sorted as he hadn't done it before. He then said we could be home by 4pm to talk to the family, that wouldn't be a problem. So I said well then if you aren't going to be that long, go on your own as I am tired. Then all of a sudden as I wasn't going there was no need for him to come along and he couldn't really tell me when he would be home.

So alarm bells went off in my head. I know what he turns into around his mates when he is alone with them and drinking. So now he couldn't tell me when he would be home. He obviously has no interest in talking to my family either and never has said more than hell to them, when I get the phone forced on me constantly to talk to anyone who rings unless I run out the room and hide. So anyway, that then blew up into an argument as by now it was 3pm and he said then fine, if he has to be back by 4pm then he wouldn't go. My point was that he had known the time all along and now it was an issue???

Turns out it was a major issue. I said to him go then, but of course now he was stubborn and being a dick so blankly refused. I spoke to my family and the only surprise was that everyone was there to talk to me for once which was nice, so did get to chat to pretty much everyone, even Anita. After that conversation, where I was by now so irritated that I was snapping at my family, and told them straight that if my visa application wasn't in very shortly and that the issues weren't sorted then I would be coming home sooner rather than later.

After that call, it was then 5pm, and I went to try and talk to him again. I hate not talking, and I hate leaving arguments unsolved and hanging. I want them sorted and resolved then and there so that we can move on. He however is different, and when he digs his heels in then that is it and talking to him is a complete waste of time as he turns into an arrogant dick. He then proceeded to blame me for everything, the fact that he never goes anywhere, that he never sees his friends, etc etc, and of course when I tired to point out why I was just nailed as then hey, I was of course going to hold it against him for the rest of his life and never get over it and he would never be able to do anything. There was no point arguing, and eventually he had me in tears, as it seems to him that I must let his friends call me a whore and shut up about it, not fighting back of course.

It was long gone 6pm and dark when eventually I just gave up. I was being shouted at or ignored, he was being nasty to me, and I was tired of crying, so for once I did what he ALWAYS does - I got up, I got dressed, and went out to meet Anschen who had rung me earlier asking what I as doing. She was out with Waldo and Celia, so I joined them at Rafters.

I did text Pio saying that if he wanted me to come home than I would but hey, of course he couldn't stoop so low as to ask the girl that he supposedly loves to come home, so that developed into another argument. I then said well if that was it then I would simply stay out and behave like everyone else in this country as maybe that was how I would fit in, if I was a whore like all of them clearly are.

From Rafters we moved to Groenekrans, and I spoke to everyone, but eventually Waldo and I landed up sitting next to each other and talking - we had an absolutely great conversation about religion and life, and by 10:30ish I remember looking at my phone for the first time in ages and had like 3 messages from Pio and one missed call. So I decided ok, he was obviously worried by his now angry text messages (don't forget he has done this to me 100 times) and got in my car and went home. Only to find - - - GUESS WHAT???? He wasn't there of course. And on top of that, not only was he not there, but he had left his phone at home so that I couldn't get hold of him.

I thought OK, took the phones in case he rang me from somewhere, and went out again. I drove all over, to Janine and Gustav's house, then all over to every pub in town looking for Gustav's car as I naturally assumed that they would be together. I finally phoned Janine assuming that I would be waking her up - she told me that they were on the beach and Pio wasn't with them. I told her I couldn't find them and she said to let her know - I agreed and said I was going to keep looking but now had no idea what I was looking for.

I eventually went back to Groenies and called Anschen to come out. We went back in together but by this time I was so mad I just sat there whilst everyone talked around me really. I landed up finally having a conversation with some other random guy and taking a bet with him about his occupation, when Anschen walked over and said to me that Pio had just walked in. I spotted him, and then went over and gave him his phone. I wasn't rude at all. Neither was he. I went back to my friends and he went back to whoever he was with when next thing, Rulf comes over and drags me out to talk to me - well what an ass he was. Stupid fool, will not go into that conversation.

After Anschen saved me and went home with the rest of the crowd, I went to find Pio to say that OK, we had best go home and stop bing such an ass, it was over now. Well, he had found Eddie from Katima and so that was that, he was staying to drink. So we stayed a bit longer and of course he was super sweet to me and all over me. When the lights came on and I was trying to get them out the door, look who walked in but Gustav. He took one look at us and if looks could kill we would be dead. I had forgotten to let them know that I had found the idiot so they had come looking for us. (In the middle of all of this somewhere Gustav had rung me and I had screamed at hm and told him exactly what I thought of him and Pio which I think prompted him to come looking for us).

I bolted after him, apologising profusely, explained what had happened and he calmed down. Next thing, Pio arrives with Eddie and his girlfriend and they are now coming back to our house - this is of course another one of his games so that he doesn't have to be alone with me. Somehow he and Gustav got into a massive fight, and almost punched each other, it was ridiculous. Pio kept telling me to f off and how he doesn't want me in his life anymore. In front of a street full of people. I even got in the car and drove off and then went back to try and get him in the car and home. Long story short, it was just a mess. I took Janine home and managed to find Pio along the way as he had run off in a fit. He then jumped out the car and after dropping Janine off I had to chase him, it was just pathetic. Gustav had to come help me, and eventually we parked the Pajero and I got in with him to keep looking.

We did eventually find him, he came back to the house, but ran away and hid when he saw us, then had to be coaxed out like a bloody animal, it was just ridiculous. Gustav was a great help and gave him a good talking to - funny thing is how it didn't last. Gustav actually came up for m for once, I was so shocked I almost fell over, he really defended me and told Pio to wake up.

Amazing that a week later, today, nothing has helped or sunk in as typically, he is being a dick again and I am being ignored and treated like shit. What a life I chose, thinking it would be such a dream come true and that I would be happy. Funny really. I am going to go for the minute as I am sitting outside, it is baking hot and I am going to die. I will continue in a little bit.

Public Holiday Thursday!

Well, it is a public holiday here, and as Murphy's law would have it, of course the sun has stopped shining. It shone all week whilst all of us were at work. Brilliant, bright and warm sunshine. Then, the one day that we all have off, it is overcast, cold, windy, and miserable. Now that is annoying. So instead of being on the beach and enjoying our day, we are once again sitting inside waiting for better days ... literally ...

So I got up nice and early, did the washing, did the ironing, cleaned the kitchen, had breakfast, and am now trying to catch up with emails and blog and do all of that. Made the bed, wrote Pio's birthday cards, fed the cats, etc etc ... Pio did nothing ... lol

So tomorrow is our birthday, and as plans for getting a puppy fell through and he certainly unfortunately is not getting me Clara I think this is going to be rather a boring birthday. Once again we have no money! I so badly wanted to go away this weekend, get out of Swakop, get away from these people and have some time at a lodge or some place where we could really just chill and not think about anything stressful. As usual, there is no money, this time thanks to the new Toyota that we are getting.

So fair enough it is a good car and it's a bargain etc etc but it does mean that we can't do anything, can't afford presents (of which I got him anyway as you can't have a birthday with no presents) so we will see. I think it's going to be another washout as usual. Seems our birthdays are doomed. I really didn't mean this to be so down and grumpy but apparently that is how I am feeling and I didn't even really realise that. I wanted us to have a good birthday and we can't even afford to do anything nice. It seems that we can NEVER afford anything.

Anyway, so tomorrow is our birthday, Pio is working as usual, so I will be sitting at home on my own for the day cleaning and ironing and cooking as usual. Yay. Looks set to be a fab day.

The Bird

This little bird was the funniest thing ever. I do regret not taking any photos of the little thing, as it would have been great to stick up a photo of it now.

Nala caught it on Sunday the 3rd May, dragging it in the back door proudly whilst Pio, Tiaan, Vicky and I sat around the table playing poker. Vicky was the first to spot it, crying out "Oh my God, she's got a bird" which meant I took a flying leap off my chair and chased her around the house, eventually tackling her before being able to get the poor little scrap away from the evil jaws of death. So it sat in my shirt shaking madly whilst we finished our poker game, and then as I had no box or anything to put it in we used a cooler box with a towel and a hot water bottle inside to keep Birdy warm.

Needless to say, it survived the night in the cooler box, and the following morning before anyone woke up I crept out onto our roof and let it out to see if it could fly again. Well, it couldn't. What it did do though was bomb off the side of the roof into the neighbours garden before I could catch it against the ledge running around the top of the roof. So I thought well hey, leave it there for the day or at least until I can get a cage sorted for the poor thing, and then could go catch it again.

I couldn't find a cage, so eventually at like 6pm that night I sent Pio to go and look for it, and he couldn't find it - whether this was by choice or whether he was just being really blind, I do not know - but at any rate, we thought that it had possibly made its way into a tree and would survive on its own.

Half an hour later Nala dragged it back through the door. Which resulted in another running, tackling, rescuing drama and from my shirt back into its cooler box where it spent yet another night. The following day it really couldn't keep living in a cooler box and still couldn't fly, so I gave up and locked it in the spare room where it got to hop around everywhere on his own and do as he pleased with water in a shot glass and some bread crumbled up.

He landed up living in there for a week, got his own wild bird food, and expelled more birdy-poo than you can ever imagine could ever come from something so small, all over the beautiful polished wooden floors ... So by Saturday we decided that it really couldn't love there anymore and no one had a cage for us - it also still couldn't fly. To top this off, Nala and Zazu were having a very adverse reaction to the poor little thing and peeing all over the house which really was the end of the rope for me. So they got belted and their noses rubbed in it and little Birdy was taken off to SPCA in the cat basket - how ironic.

Seriously though, the little bugger has a death wish. He escaped through the tiny little blocks in the front of the cat basket and straight out the front door of the SPCA and was chased by two cats and God knows how many dogs as he shot through their enclosure - for being injured, this little thing moved like a bat out of hell, really, he was super fast! And once again, he survived all of this, and the last I saw of him he was in a proper bird cage with water and food and shrieking his head off. So, unless he has escaped again, he seems to be doing quite well bless him, he was too cute.

Sadly though, this little trip to the SPCA resulted in us taking a walk around and looking at all the animals. They really do have the most beautiful kittens, really, I was so tempted, but the animal that really caught my heart was a Ridgeback cross Boerbull female that had the most beautiful and sad brown eyes. We spent a little time with her, but as she was apparently already taken, the most we could do was leave our number and hope that the people that wanted her dropped out.

The following Monday came and no phonecall, so by Wednesday I rang them only to be told that the people hadn't turned up but someone else was interested in her and she had been spayed but that said people had not paid for her so they still didn't know. I still haven't had a phonecall so she has probably been re-homed by now. She really broke my heart, I would have absolutely loved to have her. For a little while I had a suspicion that Pio had somehow arranged her for me as the stories got a little confusing between the SPCA and him, but I have since realised that this is hoping for way too much and that I probably won't even get a birthday present. I can only hope that Clara has been given a good home and will be spoilt for all her days.

Oh dear God, I am sick!

Yes, I am. As in really sick.

I have not been able to get over this flu, so now today it is officially the 9th day of being sick, and as usual I was just plodding along hoping that by tomorrow I would feel better, same shit different day basically! Whilst standing in CNA I swallowed, don't ask me what or why, and my ear felt like it was going to explode. I almost screamed. When the pain lessened, and I could walk on again, it was painful, but every now and then kept throbbing and paining and swallowing / yawning / talking wasn't pleasant.

Anyway, that was just the end. The Pajero was standing at the car wash so I had time to kill, and I walked into the doctor and asked for an appointment, just saying that I would sit and wait until he could see me. I waited an hour at any rate, but it was worth it. Just before going in, Janine and Gustav arrived - what a coincidence - as Janine was seeing the doctor as well. So got to catch up with her as I haven't seen her in ages.

Anyway, once the Doctor saw me and inspected me and looked in ears, throat and listened to chest, I have been diagnosed with Bronchitis, a sinus infection and an ear infection so my poor ear drum is swollen which is what is causing all the pain. Anyway, my chest must be quite bad as he said if it isn't better by Friday I MUST see him again and will then be sent for x-rays to assess the damage and to start treatment before it turns to pneumonia. Thrilling stuff. So now I am popping antibiotics, steroids, sticking nasal spray up my nose, drinking flu effervescents AND cough mixture. I'm going to be as high as a kite.

It is of course Murphy's law that the only time that I am working is the time that I get seriously ill and feel too bad to take time off. It is just ridiculous really, honestly, what are the chances. Anyway, this has taken absolutely ages or me to plough through writing ever so slowly and stupidly - honestly, flu should come with a warning: "May cause stupidity".

I am going to bed.

Cooking

For some reason I seem to be rather preoccupied with cooking lately, which is making me wonder if I am really getting old here ... I am making stuff that I have never had an interest in making before and actually getting some pleasure from it lol.

My first attempt a few weeks ago was a chocolate cake which was a flop but still tasted very nice so that was great, we covered it in caramel and chocolate and that was what counted more than anything else really.

Then yesterday in the midst of my flu I decided to make tomato chutney. Chopping about 30 tomatoes isn't really that much fun but got it done and then had to cook it for what seemed like hours. I actually made two - one with chilli's and one without. Tasting them halfway through I almost died as the only thing I could taste in my flu-ed up state was vinegar, but it seemed that leaving it to cool then made it better and today we had our first fried egg and chutney sandwich! It was great!

Today my task is oxtail, which I have never cooked before as well, so will see how that turns out. It has been cooking for like two hours already so will add the potatoes soon and again, hope for the best ...

Then, this week I have to make a cake for Pio to take to work as it's our birthday on Friday so this is going to be interesting!

Work !?!?

Yes, how strange is that, I am working and have been since Thursday the 7th! It's a favour for the guy that finally fixed the Pajero, so isn't exactly hard work nor is it strenuous and the people are pleasant and fun. It is also half day most of the time so it is nice actually, I still have the other half of the day to clean up and do whatever it is that keeps me busy!

But then, Murphy's law, I got sick and have been all week. It has been horrendous. Proper flu, this has not just been a cold, and because I only started so recently there was no way that I was able to take any time off so had to slog through the whole week feeling like I was dying on my feet and coughing up lots of green goo along with my lungs. Every afternoon I would stumble home and get into bed and stay there til the next morning when I had to get up and go to work ...

That meant that by this morning, a sunny Saturday, when we got woken up at stupid o clock by Pio's phone ringing for work, I had to get up and start the mountain of washing that had to be done. It's now almost 3pm and it isn't finished and it isn't all dry and has only left me with what is going to be a massive pile of ironing!! Yippee, am thrilled, particularly as still have more washing to do. And I am exhausted and am still struggling with the horrendous leftovers from this flu and just want to sleep and spend the day in bed.

But oh well, now that the house is clean and the animals are happy and the washing is almost done I am going to lie on the couch in my own cinema and hopefully sleep for the rest of this short day and eat rubbish!!

Tursday 30 April 2009 - Ethan's Birthday

Today is Ethan's 7th birthday, which he shared with his great-grandfather. Quite an amazing thing really, that he was born on his great-grandfathers birthday as well. This is one of the best photos I have - all 4 generations:


This was taken Christmas 2004 I think before my Grandfather passed away, and is a photo I will cherish forever. Today Ethan is 7 and growing so fast, he is his own independent little person and sitting ere 6000 miles away, I miss both of the boys like mad. Today I cried - it is really hard not being there for them on days like this. Ethan also said to my Mother this week that he wishes I hadn't moved as he doesn't get to see me anymore, just a "false" me - which I assume is what he thinks the webcam is. That broke my heart, it is very sad.

I watched John Grogan's Marley and Me this week - and that made me cry as well (hmmm, all this emotion could be pointing to a certain time of month approaching come to think of it) but it has to be one of the most touching stories I have watched and would love to get the book. The way it was portrayed in the movie was just brilliant, and I am sure that the book will be even better - and even more touching as it is a true story. Pio and I agreed that no, we definitely don't want as crazy a mutt as Marley, but a puppy would be fantastic. My cats are gorgeous, but they are not the same as a dog (although Zazu isn't far off admittedly, he could very well be the Marley of cats the way he destroys everything in sight). So now I get to look for a puppy!!

The week has flown by as usual. I have finished my three movies and sent them out to everyone - the one of Ethan and Aaron, Sharon and I, and the second one of Pio and I that came out very well and made me laugh my head off. So Vegas is a very cool toy!! I will keep making movies to keep me occupied and pass the day!

The Pajero is once again parked in the drive and is now running - however as usual, it now needs MORE work doing to it that I am just furious about. Am so sick of this car causing nothing but trouble. So now I am able to drive it, although it has the worst brakes in the world as that is the next thing that needs doing, along with the universal joints, then the window winders that are breaking need replacing as well, and heaven only knows what else will come up!! It's about time a match went in the petrol tank! And don't even get me started on the Toyota!

Vicky and Tiaan are coming for the weekend - oh crap, have the meat on the stove - so it will be fun. It's a long weekend, so am sure it will be busy and a lot of fun. I am feeling very tired as usual so hope I can keep up with the rest of the crazies ...

Right, let me go and finish the washing and cleaning and and and ...

Early Morning

This morning was amazing. Still is amazing actually, it isn't done yet! I was woken up with a cat chewing my toes ferociously, so sadly did not get to sleep in as I wished, which I am now quite glad about. I got up at about 6:30am, to see mist closed in around the house. I let Pio out to go to work and made a coffee thinking I could just watch Heroes without him ever knowing ;-)

Well, as I sat there looking out the window in front of the laptop, I realised how beautiful it was. The sun was shining through the mist, which moving in the wind looked and felt like fine rain coming down. It was so crisp and fresh and beautiful, I opened the door to the balcony and sat in this crisp, cool breeze feeling the mist on my face as I drank my coffee. Was absolute heaven.

What a way to wake up, fresh air, cool breeze, and the ocean. It made me feel very lucky and very privileged to be able to experience that, and have these beautiful mornings that I can enjoy almost every day, and all right here on my doorstep.

The Weekend

Well, on Friday we got in our hired X-Trail (Hertz gave us an upgrade and didn't charge us for Friday afternoon or Monday morning bless their cottons, they are stars) and drove to Windhoek. We only got there at like 8:30pm - the road between Karibib and Okahandja is so bad and full of potholes that you hav to drive way below the speed limit to prevent losing tyres. They are also working on it, they have been for 6 months, and it doesn't really look like anything has been done in that time, honestly ...

We spent the night with Vicky and Tiaan - they were having a braai so we got a drink and some lamb chops for the braai and just sat around chilling and talking to everyone. Pio and I were so tired though that we mostly sat there like lemons with no energy and falling asleep on our feet, although we managed to stay up til gone 3am - have no idea where the night went, it completely flew, and I only have these vague recollections of what happened, probably because I was so tired. What did keep us mostly awake though was once most of the people had gone home we got to play King of Beers ... oh dear ... horrendous game ... and at one point ending everything with "in my pants" was just too much!

Saturday morning arrived and I woke up to Vicky and Tiaan running through the lounge - came out of this dead dead sleep to wonder what the hell they were doing up so early in a craoky sore voice - only to discover that it was after 9am already so had to drag myself up, would much rather have carried on sleeping lol. We left at about 10:30am for our drive to Botswana, it just felt like it took forever! We did find this really cool little place on the side of the road that sold Biltong - oh my goodness, it was so nice and fresh and homemade! Fabulous!

On arrival at the border post, we were both rather nervous, as my stamp of allocate days had expired, and because of the nightmare with broken cars and Pio not getting off work and Hertz not having a car for us, we were rather nervous that we would get a penalty for being late. Thank heavens though, we got chatting to the immigration lady behind the counter and she let us right through with no problems - as did the Botswana side.

We drove on into Botswana for two hours - there is nothing on that side of the border for 200 km's, so we had to just keep driving until we got to Ghanzi and found a lodge on the other side of it. Botswana is expensive!!! Tautona Lodge was very nice, although our dinner wasn't - mine was stone cold, and the T-bone steaks we had left ALOT to be desired - we were severely dissapointed as Botswana is meant to have fabulous meat and the last time we were in the country we had the best steaks I had ever eaten. So wasn't overly impressed, and as it was so expensive didn't really help. Our room was nice though, big and a really odd shape with funny windows - it was built on top of two others, so was really interesting. It also overlooked the swimming pool, which you couldn't see because of the funny windows lol.

The return trip was fine as well - we left early as we were being attacked by horse flies and couldn't stand it anymore lol, so got to the border post around 11 / 12pm and went through without a problem again. So once again my passport is sorted for the moment and I can then move on to applying for my next visa. Once back in Windhoek we spent the evening with Dru and Silke - they have such a cute little house and the most gorgeous kitten - Bundy. It was really nice to be able to chill and watch movies and do nothing with them and get an early night. Bundy played until he was exhausted i think then KO'd, but was up and down through the night, on and off and on and off lol. He is gorgeous.

Monday morning I got up early and sat chatting to Dru and Silke about the gardens and plans, until we got ready to leave, stopped by Vicky and Tiaan to fetch the drive, and then hit the road home. Did some banking when we got here and spent the rest of the day chilling at home and watching movies. Got an early night and am meant to be fresh and full of energy this morning ... although I don't seem to be ...

Namibia

Well, it has been quite some time since I was last here. So long in fact, that I am not sure of where to begin or what to write. But seeings as I am so bored and have nothing better to do, I may as well give it a shot.

I am now in Namibia, threw the British passport to the wind and decided to do something crazy - which may very well backfire on me badly lol, but hey, if you don't try you will never know, so here I am trying it out, and it's not easy, but definitely worth the shot.

I flew in on November 20th, 2008. A date to remember really. I have been here ever since, fighting for visa's and passport stamps, as that has been much more difficult to arrange that I expected, but hopefully soon now. Then when I can work and get my life together I think it will be a very different story. At the moment boredom is a major problem!!

It has been an interesting six months, although I am now quite lazy and accustomed to doing my own thing, so it might be hard to get back into working again. Hopefully once I have my visa then I will be able to start my own business and do something worthwhile that will keep me busy and that I can have some fun with as well. Ideally it would be events, parties, weddings etc, so hold thumbs that life doesn't take another random turn!

Christmas here was not nice, but New Year was great. Easter has just gone, and we had friends from Windhoek stay which was a lot of fun. Spent a lot of time on the beach, and got the backache, neckache, headache, and armache from hell after a day on the motorbike. I don't think I will ever get used to that! So not my thing - they all laughed at me when I said I normally balance there wondering just how many bones will break when I fall off the back and land on the tar ... But it is true! It's scary, and I like my bones in one piece!

We spent most of the weekend eating, I have to admit. Braai after braai, prawns and kingklip at the Walvis Bay Yacht Club, snoek on a fire on the beach, Napolitana ... I have come to the conclusion that my life revolves around food. Speaking of which, I am starving ...

Hope and Ian spent two weeks with us, and it was fantastic. It was great having them, we had an absolute ball, and I hope they did too. We went to the lodge, so got to see a huge amount of the country and saw some fantastic scenery. Sadly, it rained rather a lot, so it wasn't a whole lot different from England- wet and green - but it was still fab. The got to see thunderstorms, unbelievable heat, east wind, the Swakop river coming down, the Zambezi in flood, so all in all, a lot of interesting things.

The Pajero of course spent most of its time breaking down and being unreliable, so is still in the garage after the head blew on the way back from Katima, and when it comes out I will be throwing a match in the tank ... This leads to the story of having to load the Toyota to the brim, piling in, and driving 600 km's in a car that didn't have brakes, handbrake, speedometer, windscreen wipers, spare tyres - oh wait, then we had a blow out - and of course the battery didn't work so we had to push start it countless times (and thanks to Pio, push start it with the handbrake on ... Luckily it didn't work :-D properly but it did slow us down ) but thanks to Hope we had a laugh a minute so it wasn't that bad. All good fun, and definitely memorable.

Other than that, life is ticking by. It is only 8 months to Christmas, time flies!!! We are off to Botswana for the weekend, so that should be fun, and the weekend after we have Vicky and Tiaan to stay!! Yay!!