What a Weekend!

Every week, from Monday to Thursday, I complain that I am getting old and need to stop drinking and partying. Every week, from Monday to Thursday, Pio ignores me and somehow half the town lands up in my living room braaiing and making an incredible mess of my house. Thank heavens glasses are cheap - thank you Hardus who broke THREE on Friday night. Although him dancing with the mop whilst attempting to clean up his mess was rather amusing as well as futile - he missed most of the mess whilst managing to look like he had stepped out of Mary Poppins with a mop instead of a chimney sweep.

So there you go, Friday originally began as I spent the week saying that I did not want to party but we had to sort the Pajero out with Gustav and I wanted to make burgers. So this moved from Tuesday night all the way to Friday night, and instead of just being Gustav turned out to be Gustav, Joani, Hardus, Rian, and Annika. OK, great. There went my peaceful Friday evening. 

Then, at around 6pm on Friday night guess who rings Pio - Francois who is on his way to Swakop with Alex, an American mate of Pio's that he met whilst staying in the guesthouse. Fine, add some more people then, and hope that we have enough rolls, mince and salads for the burgers. 

And so everyone slowly trickled in, and all was going great until Francois and Alex arrived. I was sitting in the lounge next to the fire talking to Joani and Annika, and all of a sudden I hear Bear chunk and he comes bolting in to hide behind me. I knew something was of, but on asking about it was told that Bear jumped out of the car and landed wrong. I then went to the loo and he cowered behind me then hid on the bed and actually stayed with me when I cuddled up to him. So that was it, I knew something was wrong. 

So eventually they admitted it to me; Bear had gone to greet Francois and sniffed his crotch and Francois had belted the shit out of him. Pio had told everyone to not tell me as I would blow a gasket, but I know my dog. He asked if I could just leave it, so I said fine, and my dog hid behind me for the rest of the evening. I was furious. It only got worse; Francois and Gustav got into an argument about dogs as Francois kept going on about f'ing dogs up, and Francois was so drunk he tried to push Gustav around. Gustav, although on his ear, had stuck up for my dog and told Francois if he hit Bear again he would feel it.

So they attempted to get into a fight outside the front door, and I lost it, jumped in between them and then had a go and a half, and (screaming mind you) told them to grow up and that they could only come back into my house when they had made peace. Enthusiastically snarled at them, told them to stay the f out, and slammed the gate very satisfyingly behind me. I was clearly red in the face when I got back inside, so Rian and Hardus asked what was going on, I said fight and had another enthusiastic rant, and Rian and Hardus ran out the door lightning fast to see what was going on. 

Needless to say ten minutes later peace was made and everyone came back inside. Long and short of it, Francois was a drunk moron that is no longer welcome in my house nor will I go to his farm, and his mate Alex is an arrogant American twit that spent the night raving about himself and everything that he personally has done for this country and all the government ministers etc etc that he knows and has lunches and dinners with. I took great pleasure in telling him that the government here means nothing so he can stop bragging, and I probably know them all anyway so he has no reason to brag about it. MORON!!!

So thank heavens they left, and from then on we had a really pleasant evening and the burgers were a big hit - Pio and I only got one each so everyone else must have enjoyed them. Hardus took over the braai from Pio and happily splatted burgers (hopefully he washed his hands) and braaied them. Hardus then went on to break the three glasses (I suspect it might actually be 4) and then danced with the mop. Shortly after he also got out his harmonica and played along to a few songs, which was great. 

Saturday we were going to Rian and Annika to watch the rugby, and that was also great fun. Gustav and Joani joined us, and I blame it solely on Gustav that I got drunk - we were playing darts, and someone has to nominate someone else, then you pick a number, and depending on how many times they hit that number is depending on how many times the poor idiot (me that picked the wrong number apparently) drinks. I got hit 3 times, and that was me sitting in the corner woefully dreaming of my bed. 

Nevertheless, they all refused to let me go home, and before you knew it they had me dancing in the lounge with Rian, Pio and Gustav. Joani and Annika joined in and it was great until they started to go on about going out for a drink - Rian

Sunday we chilled and did literally nothing. Was great.

Photos

Good Food and Friends

Well, last night I got caught up ranting about my phone to everyone online, and so didn't realize the time until it was gone 4pm, and then hadn't taken out anything to defrost and so lost all interest in cooking. I thought to myself  "Possibly Pio will cook when he comes in ... " should have known that was too much - he said "Of course I'll cook" and headed for the frozen sausage rolls in the freezer. How original. 

Joani arrived, as she and I were meant to go and do a recce for an idea I have had, but we got side-tracked. So anyway, we decided to go to Ocean Basket for dinner as we haven't been in a while and cooking was looking less and less like an option. Pio normally eats a great big lunch very day, and so isn't hungry when he gets in, compared to me who is starving by 6pm as I eat very little during the day.

So anyway, off we go, after putting the dog bed outside for Bear and Kita, and giving them each a big bone to chew on to keep them amused in the time that we would be gone. It really is a huge relief knowing that they have each other now and poor Bear isn't lying there alone missing us with a soulful look in his big brown eyes!

We sat outside at Ocean Basket, its cold now but being horrible smokers that is the only choice we have! It was actually a very pleasant evening, we had a drink and then ordered 18 prawns with fresh bread, garlic, chillies and butter and had that as a starter, it was divine. For mains Pio and I had Kingklip with mussels and prawns, and Joani had a platter.

It was just so nice sitting there, chilling, eating, talking rubbish, and the food was great. We left just after 8pm so still had an early night, and good food. 

Came home to discover that Kita had found the niche in the dog bed and ripped a lot of the stuffing out ...

WTF? GULP

Right people, this is your chance to rub in my face what a sarcastic and short-fused cow I am. I woke up this morning, and as I was leaving for work start looking for my phone. I couldn't find it anywhere, and so then rang it - it was off. Sit back and think for a while ... the last time I used it was at DHL yesterday afternoon. So I thought OK, must have left it there, as I didn't look for it all of yesterday or use it, and used Pio's alarm clock this morning to wake up with. 

Off I go to work and ring DHL - of course they don't have it. I politely told them that if anyone has taken it I was going to block it and report it stolen so if I caught anyone with it would charge them. I was very nice about it though, didn't rant and rave at them THANK HEAVENS. I did rant and rave on facebook though ... never have you seen a comment deleted faster than that once I realized ... I swear, this bloody dog is going to cost me a fortune. Already has and it seems it's only going to get worse. 

Took them both to the vet this afternoon, Kita for her first shots which she hasn't yet had - not at all good considering she is almost 4 months old, and Bear because he is wheezing - no bloody wonder he probably has eaten a sock or something little monster. This garden must be a gold mine for the gardener!!

So now I have a chewed phone. The Blackberry will not come on, and after trying to contact Blackberry I feel that they can shove their  "support" up their behinds as they refuse to deal with my query. The T303 is still locked and it seems that no one can unlock it, so I may just have to use my phone with no back and full of teeth marks. And Vicky's phone sock that she so kindly gave me is all shredded ... :-( 

AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH remind me again WHY I wanted animals?? The cats and Maya have cost us a total of 18 thousand this month from destroying furniture in the other house, Bear has cost heaven only knows how much in chewed clothes and shoes and now my phone. The cats claw the furniture which means never will we but anything new other than electrical appliances as those they don't seem to scratch. The joy ...

Kita with the Curly Tail

The few funny things that happened yesterday I thought I may as well write about. Should have done it last night but there you go - Bear has literally just run out of the house with something of mine in his mouth ... So after me running in and out all day and cleaning and making dinner and and and and, when Pio got home I suggested we take them out. 

So off we went in the car to a beach near to us, which we hoped had no dogs on. Unfortunately it did, and as usual Bear went berserk. Pio had Kita as she is meant to be his dog and he must train her now, and Bear is mine (sodding good training I have done, that dog hitting the end of his rope lunging after other dogs almost took me off my feet more than once). All he wants to do is say hello, but other people dislike him as he is so rough and generally bowls their dogs straight off their feet in his enthusiasm. 

So there we were, me holding Bear whilst he jumped and lunged against his rope (which is literally just a rope as I haven't had time to buy a new lead) barking and looking like he was about to murder those poor other dogs. Kita, who hasn't had any interaction with other dogs, (Bear was the first stranger that she met) took Bear's lead and went mad at them as well - great.

We gave up and took them to another beach further away on the road out of town where they could have a good run in peace without chasing and mauling other dogs.We had hoped that by getting another dog, Bear's obsession with chasing and mauling stranger dogs on the beach would stop, but alas no it seems. Anyway they had a good run, Bear being a dominating male pig most of the time.

Once back at home, we had dinner etc etc and decided to watch a movie on the projector - Old dogs with Robin Williams and John Travolta. One of the first pics on the screen was that of John Travolta's dog, and Kita, seeing this, went ballistic barking at the screen. We don't know if it is the size of the screen so that it makes people look like they're real life-size or what was going through her head, but she was totally not on board with this whole story. Pio had to sit with her for ages to calm her down, it was really funny.

She is very protective of her house it seems, she barks and goes for poor Merencia whom Bear adores, and anyone else that she doesn't know as well. That's all well and good now that she's small but when she's the size of her Dad (who apparently weighs 65 kg's) it could be a problem. Johnny in the garden is coming today, and it will be after I have left for work, so am hoping that she leaves him in relative peace and doesn't bite him! So yes, we finally have a watch dog.

Bear yesterday also managed to destroy the new toy I bought the cats within 5 minutes of buying it - I hadn't even taken it out the packaging and he had broken it ... sigh. Poor Lucifer was dragging the feathers around as he absolutely loves them, and then Bear stole those and ate them another ten minutes later. Poor Luce, the little bugger loses all his toys to Bear, it's shocking. 

Anyway, time to get dressed for work and begin another day ... yay! Am so thrilled.

Another day

Has flown by, as usual. Nothing of particular interest or excitement though, and am rather bored which is the only reason I am writing anything now! Not that I know what to write - this means we get to find out just how useless my writing skills are when I have nothing of interest to say.

"Lizzy" and "Craig" have both chatted with me, insulted me and called me old, so all three of us are on good terms although Lizzy seems to feel she is a swingers chat room as all 3 of us were chatting at the same time and relaying sarcastic comments and insults. Feels almost like I'm back in England! 

Kita, the latest addition to the mad house, is settling in well. She is a "talker", and so when she gets excited or sees you for the first time she howls with excitement which is very cute. Bear has stopped howling at the gate like a lost child, so hopefully the old bid that keeps grilling me about his welfare will stop! Seriously though, who could ever mistake a big, fat, shiny-coated mutt that constantly has half my clothes and bones the size of himself to eat every day, as being ill-treated??? He eats better than I do. 

She took a chomp out of Lucifer this morning, vicious little bag, so got her bum truly smacked. My cats are totally off-limits to these crazy dogs and they better believe I will drop them off at SPCA if they do! Yes, I am an evil Mother that doesn't care for her children. Poor Lucifer who is a very brave if very small little soul tried to put her in her place and got taken out - he spent the rest of the morning quaking on the garden roof / wall and came running when I got home from work crying his little heart out. Kita Cow will get her ass kicked if she goes down that road again!!!

She kept us up quite a lot last night - I think she gets bored. Bear climbs in and out the window in the lounge and so keeps himself amused, but she is still too little to and so wakes us up. I was so amazed, Pio actually got up for her to let her out! It didn't help that I had to get up 5 minutes later to get her back in, but the thought was there and it was truly appreciated. 

I also got a long email from Hope which was great, and finally got to send some photos out to everyone of our menagerie and Pio and myself. Sharon kindly told me that I have lost weight and am looking rather thin ... sigh ... can we ever win? Scrawny me - comes from running after 5 animals and a male child of 30. 

Anyway, nothing interesting and exiting to report so am off to shower and read my book!

Well well ...

Who would have thought ... 

I got a very strange message today, from a good friend of mine in England. As she wishes to remain anonymous as no one apparently knows this secret, let's think of a name for her - OK, Elizabeth! Lizzy for short ha ha ha - that's out of spite as she calls me that lol. "Rhoda Elizabeth Jones!!!" She shrieks when she's annoyed with me; I don't have a middle name, but she says it carries more weight if she adds one in.

Now we need a name for the other character in this story ... difficult one actually ... he and I go back aways ... umm Craig will have to do. First thing that popped into my head apart from Pio or Tiaan and I can't steal their names, would just be weird really. Craig and I used to work together quite closely and for some time, and I thought he was really quite fit but I was in a relationship and so was he, and we were really just good mates, got along like a house on fire. Lizzy was always the one going "No I don't think he's fit, not my type at all!" Huh!! (very loud snort)

So Lizzy sends me a very odd mail this afternoon. It begins: "I have a bit of news for you and have no idea how you are going to react….so please read this very carefully and try and keep an open mind….looking forward to your reaction ... "
                                        

Right, so this immediately makes me think Oh Good Lord, she's pregnant; or something equally disastrous. On it goes, saying that she really would like it if I didn't bite her head off, and I needed to read and think before I reacted, and take things calmly dot dot dot. Hmmm. Turns out the great dramatic news was simply that the two of them had gotten together! Odd yes, how on earth they managed to get that right am really not very sure at all :-) but overall it is very good news. Apparently both of them were apparently terrified at my reaction and waiting for it with bated breath. Idiots. The only reaction Lizzy got was me pissing myself with laughter. 
                                                     

Then, the old evil side kicks in ... 

"Lizzy," I say, "Shall I mail Craig and tell him off as I imagined that he was saving himself for me and now he's pulling into my best mate, shock horror??? Am mortally wounded whatnot whatnot."
                                          

Lizzy is really just as evil: "Go for it!" she says. So there I go, type a quick mail to Craig and crap him out, saying how dare he go near my best mate, it's totally out of line! Unfortunately, the silly cow is obviously totally crazy about him as she bloody went and told him it was only a joke ... sigh ... there went my afternoon of fun. On the other hand, I could always email HER tomorrow and say that I had a good think about it and am horrified by it, they have broken my delicate heart! Bless her, could I be so cruel - uh, yes!!
                                        

Overall the jokes and laughs, it's kind of bittersweet for me, and really makes me think of ol' England and the friends that have been so good to me. Whenever I'm down, something will happen, and their comments and emails and words really have made a difference. The freaky thing is, I have this kind of feeling that this is it for them, etc etc - another "end of an era". 
                                               

Who knows, maybe I am wrong, but they fit. And whichever way it goes I can only wish them the best of luck, xo xo.

OK, I actually shrieked

About what? Well, this is a story. 

I am now 27 years old, 28 being a mere month away, and have never had the courage to go for a Brazilian wax, which is apparently one of the things you should do before you die - quite frankly, the idiot that said that is probably male and wouldn't let a woman wielding hot wax anywhere near that specific area of his anatomy. Moron. 

Well my darling lady, Alicia, that takes great delight in ripping the rest of my body hair out once a month, has always said "Go on, you won't regret it, it's great, and the pain is really only irritating more than painful! You'll be fine!" I think that beauticians are taught to lie in beauty school in order to sell painful and unnecessary treatments to clients and line their pockets - sorry Alicia, I love you to bits.
                                                                                                                                      

So, this month, I was suitably hairy enough to have it all ripped out, and for some stupid reason, without even thinking about it, did an Internet payment to her before I went for full leg, bikini, Brazilian, and underarm - clearly I have no brains. I know that there are women out there that have a high pain threshold and can handle these things - I am not one of those. I generally have to split my wax over two days and come out shaking like a leaf in a breeze, then have to down some sort of alcohol after to numb the pain and walk funny til the pain subsides enough to go back to normal.

So off I went, in high spirits, and when I arrived told Alicia cheerfully that I had paid for it but would see how I went, I probably wouldn't have the courage. Alicia is great at getting me on that table in my underwear and then not letting me get back up again til she's ripped every last bit of wax off and then tweezed a few extra ones as well the cow. I sometimes wonder if you have to be a sadist to be a beautician, sugar-coating pain is their trade mark! 

So we did the legs, front and back, and as long as I keep talking I'm generally OK as then I am either laughing or up in arms about something, and bless her heart, Alicia tries her best to keep me talking so that I don't swear - she is a good Christian girl and I feel awful for f'ing and blinding in front of her - I should take a wooden spoon with next time to bite down on actually, that might help.

On we went to the bikini line, and then the dreaded words came: "Right, knickers off!" 

I gulped: "Do I have to?" 

"Well no," says Alicia cheerfully, "but then I can't really see what I'm doing."

Right, thanks to my parents, I am very strong on the point of if you're going to do something, do it properly. I dropped my knickers. Shocking I know. Thank heavens no one really reads this blog, as it only gets worse. Sorry Mom, you're going to be totally scandalized.

The worse bit being is that in order to complete a Brazilian, you have to wax almost everything off down there, apart from a wee bit on top. In order to get to these slightly inaccessible bits, the legs need to be spread...This was actually worse than my first ever smear - a possibly worse than all of them rolled into one ... but there you go, "finish the job properly" echoing in my head and all, thanks Mum and Dad, don't I wish I was a half-job Harry!

So off we go, bright purple wax smeared all over - something else sugar-coated might I add; do they think that because the wax is a gorgeous shade of purple you'll be too busy admiring it to not scream in pain?? The top wasn't so bad, I must say. Painful yes, but only slightly worse than the normal bikini area, so bearable I suppose. The sides however (how do I say this without it being incredibly rude??) am not sure. Well the best and all that I will say is the top is done, so use your imagination to figure out what is left - the sides of down there!!! AAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

When the first bright purple bit if wax was ripped off, Alicia briskly and professionally saying that once you've seen one you've seen them all, I actually shrieked and said "F" at the top of my lungs. That pain is totally indescribable and it really didn't stop for quite some time. The part that I am sure most people will find rather amusing, is that Alicia's beautiful little beauty room is within a gym - so you have to walk through a gym that is generally filled with people to get to her, and as I can hear music and people from inside with the door closed, I am damn sure they heard me!!! Walking out after was rather embarrassing to say the least. 

"See?" Alicia said cheerfully. "It's done and it wasn't so bad was it?"

I was still biting my hand to prevent myself screaming again. "It's not done!" I shrieked when I could talk again. "You have to do the other side!" My horror at this was also indescribable. Sod Chinese torture, next time Pio pisses me off I am waiting til he's asleep and am going to spread wax all over his balls and then wake him up and wish him the best of luck.

"Yes yes," Alicia says cheerfully, "But its only one more tiny strip and we're done!" Oh yes, of course we're done, except there were 3 more strips and my underarms!!! Only then I was able to get up and put my clothes back on very gingerly. 

Alicia then cheerfully told me that in the meantime since my last visit, that her prices had actually increased, so I owed her money. My jaw dropped - basically, I hadn't actually paid for a Brazilian, but the very clever girl had done it and THEN told me. She probably knew that if she told me before I would never have agreed to it - I admire her!

I gratefully left after forking out some more cash, looking at the floor as I ran through the gym! 

So word to the wise ladies - a Brazilian really isn't all that its cracked up to, and quite frankly, that very well may be the last time I ever venture down that stupidly painful road. Apparently it was the Egyptians that first came up with the idea of waxing (thanks Wikipedia) and honestly, what a bunch of idiots. Surely, with all the technology out there in the world, if a man can walk on the moon, why the hell can't there be a painless way to remove hair??

Should have been titled "Today" ...

but thanks to crappy internet that wasn't possible, so we will have to settle with calling this post "Yesterday".

It was a rather amusing day and started off fairly well. I went to work with nothing untoward happening. Bear was no madder or crazier than usual. I managed to get some stuff done at work that was half decent, finally, thank heavens, now I just bet they won't like it ...

Anyway, got home, all well and good. Apart from the fact that Bear was lying peacefully on the front step as if it was impossible for him to climb through the lounge windows and ravage the house. His one error - evidence! One of my poor shoes was lying in front of him whilst he looked up at me with innocent brown eyes, all excited to see me. Well, he got a smack with said shoe and sulked for the rest of the afternoon.

I had to take Lillith to the vet, so off I trotted with a small yowling cat in her basket, all the way to town. My time at the vet was rather informative. Lillith requires daily sunblocking as she is so white - great stuff, have to go buy SPF50 for my cat ... we also discussed Bear's problem of being so horny it must be driving him totally insane, and the benefits of having his balls chopped off. It seems like a great plan, however, we also worked out that testosterone helps develop muscle structure and all that bollocks, so we are going to try and hang on until he is a year or so old and fully grown before removing these rather offending items that make my life difficult ...

The most amusing part of all of this though is that my delicate, white-furred, blue-eyed kitten named Lillith, whom EVERYONE that looked said was female (shows how much you lot know) is actually a BOY!! So after a mild disagreement I decided to believe the vet as he clearly has more expertise in that area than I do, however it gave him a good laugh. Now, we have to think of a new name for this terror as well - so far the vet suggested Goliath, which I quite like as hopefully he'll grow to be big and strong but that is rather doubtful, and then Banzai, Kovu, or Nuka from the Lion King, so decisions decisions.

Well, so off we went home, Lillith / Goliath etc with a newly acquired pair of balls. I am becoming severely outnumbered in this house, 4 males to 2 females - no wonder Nala was so pissed at the latest addition, now I don't blame her in the slightest!

Anyway, so on getting home with my cat in tow who insisted on riding out of his cage, Bear came to greet us with all the enthusiasm in the world, finally over his sulk that had lasted from 1pm to what was now 4:25pm. Poor bugger, I had another appointment and had to drop them and run off again, only getting home after 5. Pio of course neglected to tell me that he was already in town when I left and so had to sit on the back lawn waiting as well!

So we progressed with dinner and choosing names for Goliath etc, which we still have not decided on, and made chicken in soy on jasime rice which sounds rather exotic but I think it was rather gross. I was kind enough to put rice, gravy, and all the chicken skin aside for Bear, and even gave it to him in one of our white bowls that Christine bought us - don't tell her ...

Bear has a thing, and this does not come from spoiling at all. He will only eat what is either fed to him on one of our plates or off one of our plates when it is done in full sight of him so that he cannot be conned into eating dog food. I tried to con him last night, he wouldn't accept it. However, when I scraped my leftovers on top of his bowl or chicken and rice, he ate it all, neatly leaving the "dog food". Little shit.

Anyway, so Pio was finishing up some work, and I attempted to brush Bear. This dog has an incredibly woolly bum. The rest of him is normal Husky fur, however his bum has an extra layer of down that is just incredibly thick and constantly itchy. Brushing him is always a war, where he chews me, runs around, and practically has to be held down whilst I attack him to try and get some of this down out. I made the mistake of leaving the brush lying within his reach the one day and so he attempted to destroy it, so every time I use it I get splinters as well from a mutilated handle. War over, once he had bitten me, fallen on top of my hand, got a smack for his trouble, and eaten some of his own fur as if he hates to part with it, we decided to take him for a walk.

So in the car and off we go .. yet now there are other dogs on the beach. A pleasant couple with three practically puppies, a Pit Bull, Staffie cross Jack Russell and another Jack Russell. Pio made the fatal mistake of allowing Bear to pull him along, and so the dog went wild and bowled all three pups off their feet. It took quite some time to calm him down and get him away from them. On we continued, me eventually taking Bear as Pio had not a lot of control over him and was being pulled down the beach like a steam train.

We let him off eventually, when the other dogs were out of sight, however he spotted the tiniest little dog (like Dee's whatever that rat is) and attempted to take it on. Well 5 minutes later we were in total hysterics, as this tiny dog no bigger than Bear's head, chased him all over the beach, up and down, biting him and yapping at his heels. Finally, Bear had met his match in something one tenth of his size. We finally rescued him after having a good laugh, and then he was in a total sulk with us. We got as far as the car, and in a strop, he decided that he had had enough, and bottled back down the beach. This is the first time that he has done this, and I am sure that it was because he was in a total sulk over us leaving him to be abused by a teeny-tiny mutt.

Off I want to fetch him, and he got put back on his lead and made to walk next to me back to the car. Well it took him some time to get over that latest offense! He lay in front of the door at home in yet another major sulk, and after giving him time to cool off I had to make amends ...

Honestly ... with these moods and temper tantrums, who needs kids????

The Last Week

Has been a bit hectic and I am totally exhausted. I think that if these bloody animals would actually let me sleep I would probably KO for a week and nothing would wake me!

Pio has been away on training since last Sunday in Johannesburg to my intense irritation as it means that I have to stay here alone, in this great big house with no protection - no, Bear is not a watch dog AT ALL and would probably lick them to death before protecting me - so I have had very little sleep through nerves even though Joani came to stay with me. On top of that the animals seem to be taking perverse pleasure in waking me up constantly throughout the night, and so sleep has been minimal and I am now ready to kill them with great delight or simply remove them to the SPCA for a few days so I can get some sleep.

It also seems that throughout the course of the night one of them has stolen my silver bracelet and no doubt eaten it - this could only be Bear, who in the last week has been in a particularly evil mood even though has has been out every night apart from one for walks, has destroyed my silk bed cushions, shoes, and heaven only knows what else that I haven't actually found yet.

Yesterday he was alone all day because of the wedding, and my trainers took a beating there even though he was locked inside he must have climbed into the house through the window to destroy something of mine out of spite. Yes, they should be in the cupboard, but I had literally 5 minutes to change and make up yesterday before doing the wedding.

So last night between the animals I got no sleep and am now so tired I could just fall over, but have to go and clean up after the wedding yesterday and make sure everything gets back to the right place etc etc. I will explain the wedding and post photos later if I have the energy, but have a ton of stuff to do today and mostly just want to sleep ...

Here's hoping that it goes well and that I get a break and have a restful day after I get all the work done ...