What a Weekend!

Every week, from Monday to Thursday, I complain that I am getting old and need to stop drinking and partying. Every week, from Monday to Thursday, Pio ignores me and somehow half the town lands up in my living room braaiing and making an incredible mess of my house. Thank heavens glasses are cheap - thank you Hardus who broke THREE on Friday night. Although him dancing with the mop whilst attempting to clean up his mess was rather amusing as well as futile - he missed most of the mess whilst managing to look like he had stepped out of Mary Poppins with a mop instead of a chimney sweep.

So there you go, Friday originally began as I spent the week saying that I did not want to party but we had to sort the Pajero out with Gustav and I wanted to make burgers. So this moved from Tuesday night all the way to Friday night, and instead of just being Gustav turned out to be Gustav, Joani, Hardus, Rian, and Annika. OK, great. There went my peaceful Friday evening. 

Then, at around 6pm on Friday night guess who rings Pio - Francois who is on his way to Swakop with Alex, an American mate of Pio's that he met whilst staying in the guesthouse. Fine, add some more people then, and hope that we have enough rolls, mince and salads for the burgers. 

And so everyone slowly trickled in, and all was going great until Francois and Alex arrived. I was sitting in the lounge next to the fire talking to Joani and Annika, and all of a sudden I hear Bear chunk and he comes bolting in to hide behind me. I knew something was of, but on asking about it was told that Bear jumped out of the car and landed wrong. I then went to the loo and he cowered behind me then hid on the bed and actually stayed with me when I cuddled up to him. So that was it, I knew something was wrong. 

So eventually they admitted it to me; Bear had gone to greet Francois and sniffed his crotch and Francois had belted the shit out of him. Pio had told everyone to not tell me as I would blow a gasket, but I know my dog. He asked if I could just leave it, so I said fine, and my dog hid behind me for the rest of the evening. I was furious. It only got worse; Francois and Gustav got into an argument about dogs as Francois kept going on about f'ing dogs up, and Francois was so drunk he tried to push Gustav around. Gustav, although on his ear, had stuck up for my dog and told Francois if he hit Bear again he would feel it.

So they attempted to get into a fight outside the front door, and I lost it, jumped in between them and then had a go and a half, and (screaming mind you) told them to grow up and that they could only come back into my house when they had made peace. Enthusiastically snarled at them, told them to stay the f out, and slammed the gate very satisfyingly behind me. I was clearly red in the face when I got back inside, so Rian and Hardus asked what was going on, I said fight and had another enthusiastic rant, and Rian and Hardus ran out the door lightning fast to see what was going on. 

Needless to say ten minutes later peace was made and everyone came back inside. Long and short of it, Francois was a drunk moron that is no longer welcome in my house nor will I go to his farm, and his mate Alex is an arrogant American twit that spent the night raving about himself and everything that he personally has done for this country and all the government ministers etc etc that he knows and has lunches and dinners with. I took great pleasure in telling him that the government here means nothing so he can stop bragging, and I probably know them all anyway so he has no reason to brag about it. MORON!!!

So thank heavens they left, and from then on we had a really pleasant evening and the burgers were a big hit - Pio and I only got one each so everyone else must have enjoyed them. Hardus took over the braai from Pio and happily splatted burgers (hopefully he washed his hands) and braaied them. Hardus then went on to break the three glasses (I suspect it might actually be 4) and then danced with the mop. Shortly after he also got out his harmonica and played along to a few songs, which was great. 

Saturday we were going to Rian and Annika to watch the rugby, and that was also great fun. Gustav and Joani joined us, and I blame it solely on Gustav that I got drunk - we were playing darts, and someone has to nominate someone else, then you pick a number, and depending on how many times they hit that number is depending on how many times the poor idiot (me that picked the wrong number apparently) drinks. I got hit 3 times, and that was me sitting in the corner woefully dreaming of my bed. 

Nevertheless, they all refused to let me go home, and before you knew it they had me dancing in the lounge with Rian, Pio and Gustav. Joani and Annika joined in and it was great until they started to go on about going out for a drink - Rian

Sunday we chilled and did literally nothing. Was great.