Turning 30

Has not been wonderful for me. I had a very small night out with my girls that drove up all the way from Swakop, which was great, and we had fun, but due to age instead of staying out until the sun rose I was home by 2am and got myself into bed very quickly. It took me two days to recover.

So first things first; after turning 30 you can expect miserable hangovers and adverse reactions to alcohol that you never used to have any effects from. Yippee. So now I approach a bottle of wine or a shot of Jaegermeister with extreme caution and thought; how much of my time do I want to waste the next day by lying in bed???

I can't even drink Coke anymore - it must be due to the caffeine or sugar, but 4 glasses of coke will be enough to have me staring at the ceiling all night long, unable to sleep. There goes my favorite drink!! I also can't drink Hunters Extreme as two of those will have the same effect on me.

I need sooooo much sleep too! Gone are the days when you could be up early and party until the following morning, sleep for a few hours and do it all again - oh no, now you need at least eight to ten hours of sleep and ten liters of water to restore your system to normal! Staying home in a warm bed is now vastly more appealing than venturing out to socialize, as at the least I know I will be able to get up in the morning!

I have never been someone to get up during the night and go for a pee. I could do long haul flight without peeing once as I hate public toilets. Now??? Pfft! Every night without fail I am up to go to the bathroom ... problem is, then I have an additional problem - once I'm up there is no way I will sleep again. So I get to lie in bed and contemplate life from anywhere between 2m and 4 am until it's time to get up. The things that you can come up with at that time of the morning when you can't make a noise or do anything constructive is quite impressive. However, it does tend to make for a grumpy day when I have only had 5 hours of sleep ...

Oh - and then I put my back out. Fabulous! Turn 30 and you lose your back as well! So that has resulted in severe pain and many visits to the doctor and osteopath only for it to get better on it's own eventually, although now I have to be very careful when lifting or carrying ... no more gardening, painting, moving, and doing everything myself as I have always done. Joy!!! The up side to this is that I am allowed to have help for cleaning and gardening when it get's too much for me, although standing by and watching is not really my style.

Life does change after 30 - for me anyway. I feel that now I can't be out and about and irresponsible. I must behave myself, act like a lady, and basically, be my age!! There are days when I would love to forget responsibilities and people that rely on me and fly off the handle and go do something crazy. Then I look around me at some people who don't act their age and hold to their responsibilities and it tends to disgust me, so I ignore those urges and do the correct thing. This may possibly be because of the way that I look at other people, and know how I dislike what they do or how they look, and so do my best to not be judged.

So here's to being 30 and a new chapter in my life; it may take a bit of getting used to. I am very nostalgic for the teenage years when you have everything in the world at your fingertips and don't see the advantage in it or use it to the fullest. I think that may be the biggest regret for most people. But you have to take everything in your stride and live it to the full (even whilst trying to avoid a hangover) and hope that one day you will look back on a life filled with love and happiness.

Technologically challenged ...

I honestly didn't think I was that stupid when it came to computers and finding my way around new pages, purchasing items online or getting used to new things. It seems I am wrong.

It began with having to get used to a new online banking system when we changed banks. So that took a little while, but I got there and am finally comfortable with and understand it. Then our savings bank changed it's entire layout and process of internet banking. It's now been months and I am no closer to knowing how to get a statement or make a payment - although apparently a lot of people are moaning about how useless it is so although it makes me feel a little better it still isn't great. 

Then my own bank changed it's online system and there I am, back to square one and totally lost months on again. Again, people do say it's a daft system, but seriously - how can I not manage to figure out and remember any of their stupid systems???

So onward with the monthly struggle of making payments and printing statements ... then this morning I decide to try a blog again after many months of not doing so. I am lost. Blogspot used to have a little dashboard button where you could update all your info, and now for the life of me I cannot figure out where to go and change all my details, as I am no longer 27 and no longer live in Swakop, etc etc. It's beyond me. I have clicked on everything you can click on and still cannot find it, so am missing something big somewhere. 

I also have no idea how to use paypal, which in this day and age is daft as well - but looking at it just confuses me. So it seems that once you turn 30 it really is all downhill ... and understanding technology is a thing of the past ... 

Seriously ...

I sometimes cannot believe that people have the audacity to do what it is that they do! I can't understand how they think that they are correct, have done nothing wrong, or do not deserve certain things happening to them and play at shock or horror or whatever other emotion they choose.

Example 1: We have a house in Windhoek that we have rented out for the last four years to a family. In the first two years the property seemed well-maintained and cared for. I was recently there to view the house and discuss them moving out as we are moving back to Windhoek, only to find that the property has been all but destroyed. Some bedrooms are painted awful colors, bathrooms mirrors are broken, the stove is broken, cupboard doors missing, and to top off the disgusting mess that the garden has been left in (full of rubble and shopping trolleys) they have burnt a gigantic hole in the solid meranti wooden deck ... 

I am quite proud of myself, I didn't lose my cool on the spot and jump up and down, nor have I since. The house is so disgusting I am shuddering at the thought of having to move back into it, but am out of choices really. Even the estate agent was shocked when she saw it and suggested that some repairs be done before attempting to sell, so I asked nicely for the lessors to mend the damage done and to ensure the property is in a fit state by the time that they move out.

Pffftttt!!!! We all know how that's going to go.

So now we live in Swakop, and after being here for three years we decide to buy the beautiful old house we are living in, as we can afford it if we rent out the 3-bedroom flat. This we do, and the people that move in seems just as lovely as anyone. They even warn me up front that there is the POSSIBILITY that they might not be able to pay the full rent for a couple of months due to a financial situation, but if it in any way is not possible they would pay in full, all I had to do was say. They would also then pay all outstanding money as soon as they received their pay-out.

So, I agree. The first two months are super, rent paid. After that it goes down to less than half the rent and no electricity. They are nice people and I don't bother them but rather try to help. Then comes the day I need to say, please pay your rent in full now as it's affecting my budget - I get an email simply saying they can't pay and want to move out. Sod the contract, sod two months notice as agreed, sod everything, just a flat we cannot pay and want to move. 

I am not overly impressed and say fine, move out mid-September, at least that gives me 2 weeks to renovate the flat yet AGAIN because they have badly damaged the paint and heaven only knows what else. I get ignored, and only after threatening a law-suit do I get a response, only to say that they have paid a little of what is owed and I must take the rest out of the deposit and they will then pay the remaining amount when they can. Amusing, as they never even paid a full deposit and seem to be full of righteous indignation that I have dared to ask them for rent!

So the story goes. I am going to make best buds with my lawyers soon enough!!

 

I Did It!

Ok, it's not much, I just made my first sale on the plants I have taken out of my garden. I take babies and cutting out of the garden and have had them sitting in neat little black bags for months, trying to get the courage together to sell them. I have Arum lilies, Spider plants, ferns, and some kind of cactus thing that I don't know the name of. 

 

I keep them separate for so long just to make sure they haven't gotten worms or snails or any other bug in them that people might be annoyed about and then come back to complain! I know for a fact that these haven't, are healthy and growing like bombs. Poor things aer growing out of their bags and I have roots creeping scross concrete and between paving stones.

My garden is a big and ongoing project. I thought I was clever and allowed some beautiful ground cover to grow inbetween my grass, not realizing that it would indeed take over and kill said grass. I have since had to butcher my lawn and chop out all the grass that was infected with evil ground cover and start again; this has taken weeks on hands and knees digging up the soil to get every last root out, as the evil stuff grows out of nowhere it seems. There was also no distinction between grass and flower beds, so I moved the flower beds right in, took some plants out, and have been planting grass all around them as well.

I had the palm trees shaved, and now with them all clean and nice, the beds shaped, and grass planted (although not yet growing) it is starting to look like something. It still needs a lot of work, and a lot of moving around, and if we stay here in Swakop and don't move to Windhoek I am going to put in some beautiful vegetable and herb gardens. I have already planted everything I want from seed, and am praying that they grow! Seeds are a little more difficult than seedlings already grown.

As I now have made my first sale, the money is going straight back into my garden. I need more grass seed, and would love some bright flowers as my garden is very green at the moment, especially just outside the back door. Some beautiful color wouldn't go wrong at all! So I might make a trip to the nursery this morning and see what I can spend my first sale on!

Do they honestly need all that????

I mean really, do they???? 

Yesterday morning I finally bit the big, scary bullet and phoned three different numbers to try and find out if I could apply for a 5-year family visa to visit the UK. This means that I would then be able to fly in and out on holidays and not have to worry about applying for a visa every time, and if there should happen to be an emergency I wouldn't have to go through months of an application process before being able to fly. 

I phoned the British Council - no answer ten calls later. I phone the British High Commission - please phone back after 10am. I phone back after 10 am - please phone our visa office. I phone the visa office - they can't actually tell me if I can apply for the Family Visa or much of anything really. Pretty useless. So I go print off the forms and have a read through - all ten pages of them that must be filled out in blue or black ink. 

So I make a cup of coffee and get started ...  details details details .... parents, brothers, sisters, nephews, aunts, uncles, cousins, telephone numbers, addresses, passport details, residence details, and so the list winds on ... my poor Mother has been tasked with getting copies of everyone's passports as well as details of their own private lives and letters saying that they would love to have me come stay!

And just try explaining in a 2cm square box that your boyfriend supports you, you don't work as you are not living in the country of your passport, but in another country altogether and don't yet have a visa! I can sense a ten-page letter coming on which will have to be attached to said visa form, which undoubtedly won't be read and sadly means I might not be lucky enough to get my Family Visa ... sigh. The box that they give you to fill in for other things that they should "consider" whilst looking at your application is rather small too.

So Mother has been sent a list of things that she needs to do and then courier to me before I can even send in my application, and in the meantime I will try and take on the Home Office here to at least give me a letter stating that I have applied for a visa and am legal here. It's all rather daunting really - here's hoping tomorrow it won't seem so bad!

Hope's Sprog

We first learned that my sister Hope was pregnant with her first child in March when my parents were visiting me from the UK. This was very unexpected but on the other hand we all know Hope will be the perfect mother so of course were all very happy for her ... secretly though a little sad as I knew this meant a very long delay before she would be able to come to me for a holiday again.

But nevertheless, my Mother and I went shopping for a variety of baby goodies and cute things that they wouldn't be able to get in England (like a Springbok baby grow lol) and packed them all into Mother's bulging suitcase to send home with her.

Hope and I have been communicating mostly over Skype, which at most times is totally useless, but I do get the occasional email when she has the strength to do so! I prefer emails as there is more I can read and quite frankly, remember. When I forget it means that I can go back and read it again - and here Hope is complaining about her baby-brain and not remembering anything ... 

Here is a scan of "The Bean" at 5 weeks and 5 days:

So with these things I honestly think that its only the parents that can ever see anything ... or is that just me??? I once had someone show me a scan like this and then gushed at me how the baby was actually waving at her. I mean really, actually waving. OK whatever, over-enthusiastic mother! All I could see was a dot much like this one. Although I must admit that when this is full screen I can actually make out the bean that is meant to be a baby :-D!!

So now that hope is progressing at an alarmingly fast rate and I must really get my rear into gear and get my visa sorted so that I can go visit them in November and hopefully be there for the birth around the 18th - although we all are well aware how Murphy works in our life! So I am quite sure I will miss it no matter when I fly, even though Hope is sure it will be early. 

Here are a couple more pics from the 5th July - Hope is now around 20 weeks in:

Here you can actually see Little One's arms, head and ribs, which is just too cute and amazing! Hope's comments were: 

"The cheeky little thing wouldn't stop moving during the scan, I can feel her moving often, but to actually see it happening on a screen was rather amazing. Today I am 20 weeks and 4 days, every Saturday is a new week. That makes me past the halfway mark now. Only another 19 and something weeks to go, but I get the feeling it will be early. I am being kicked now as I am typing. The scan wasn't clear enough to see the sex, but I am sure it is going to be a girl. Dad thinks so too."

I commented that us Jones's always have boys first, 2 in fact, and only then girls, so I am betting on a boy.

"Hi,

 

The Jones' may have boys, but this one is a Bloy! Every person I speak to looks at me and says, "that's a girl". It's thinking of names next. Luckily I have not painted anything. We are planning to move out of this house when the lease expires so it is a waste of money doing it up.

The due date was given as the 18 November, however all of mom's were prem, and I don't think the scan dating is accurate, so I am preparing myself for earlier. 

 

The weather here is awful, no rain, we are having a drought. Seriously, the corn and maize has barely grown at all this year. My grass is dead in the back garden, all plants need to be watered every day. 

 

Anyway, I am supposed to be cleaning the house, but I might have a sleep for 20 minutes first. Little one is kicking me and making my stomach feel like it is turning inside out. lol.

 

Talk soon.

 

P.S. Darren keeps talking about going to Namibia for a holiday......we will see if he gets the courage for it."

Darren is terrified of flying, so am really not getting my hopes up there. Our Aunt Anita mailed me recently too and said that they are taking bets on the boy/girl issue as now no one knows what color to buy or knit or embroider etc.  The concerns of being an Aunt or a Grandmother ha ha ha!

The latest correspondence from Dopey - received this morning, reads as follows:

"Hello,

 

I have to apologize, I never get around to keeping in touch.

 

Well the top of the uterus has now grown to above my belly button and so I am starting to really look pregnant. I have some pain as my ligaments are stretching, and my hips are loosening, which keeps me awake at night, its quite painful. I also have an itchy belly as my skin is stretching, so i have to keep it well moisturized in the hope of keeping stretch marks at bay. And then don't forget the baby brain which makes me drop everything i pick up, and forget everything that is said to me or what I did 5 minutes ago.

 

The baby is fully formed now, it has all it's organs......heart, lungs, bladder, the works. All fully functioning. It has fingernails, eyelids and eyebrows. And it is starting to produce a layer of fat under its thin skin. Apparently I could go into labor at any point from now. Baby can hear loud sounds and already knows my voice, poor child. Baby is about 28 cm's from crown to heel, and weighs about 450 gms.

 

And I am so tired I think that is all I am going to be able to write!

 

Dad is doing ok, still having a few pains. But he is off to see the doc on wed.

 

Hope all is well your side."

Lets hope that she doesn't go into labor anytime soon ... we still need to wring another 18 weeks out of her! Our Dad keeps giving everyone the fright of our lives by going into hospital with chest pains after his recent heart attack so lots to worry about when so far away :( but am really looking forward to November and seeing everyone - that means get my butt into gear and get this visa sorted out!!

2011

And so a New Year begins! I always thought that depending on how you start the New Year is how it should go; if that's true then I'm in some serious kak! I think it was possibly the worst New Year's Eve ever for me although Joani and Saskia made it great. It started off good enough and then slowly took a downward spiral from which my poor car has not yet recovered.

So to start a New Year badly always feels like a really bad downer but hopefully we can get past that and move forward. For some inspiration from The Purple Hat by Erma Bombeck and to try and live this year by these rules:

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day be cause my hair had just been done.
 
I would have sat on the lawn and not worried about grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, 'Later. Now go get washed up for dinner.' There would have been more 'I love you's' More 'I'm sorry's.'

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute, look at it, and really see it . . live it and never give it back. STOP SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF!!!

Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what
Instead, let's cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us.

My New Profession

Is really nothing exciting. Since the gardener walked out, that is what I am: a gardener! 

Today I mowed the lawn for the first time in my life, which was really rather hard work for my scrawny arms, particularly as my joints are all still particularly crotchety and arthritic after my recent run in with a streptococcal virus. I have no nails left, I'm constantly filthy, and the garden looks no different!

Well the cut grass makes a world of difference actually; it looks really good, although I should haves tarted in the back and not the front garden. As it was my first time ever I had to figure out how to use the lawnmower; not all that logical really, but I did it. Why on this planet do you have to press the extremely hard button AND hold the handle permanently? My poor right hand is dead and sore from squeezing the bloody handle that kept stopping the moment you slacken grip for a second. 

Then, which is rather funny, all of a sudden half way through the front lawn the mower stopped, and nothing would get it started again. I thought I had been real blonde and broken the mower within five minutes of using it, and was already planning my argument with Pio about it and booking myself in to have my nails done, never to garden again! I then walked inside, flopped disgustedly in front of the computer, only to find it off ... 

Yes, the power had tripped! The plugs in this house trip everything constantly so it really should have been something I should have looked at but there you go, lack of brains I guess. So on I went, and have cut neat little circles into all the edges as it took me some time to work out how to cut an edge without digging the blade into the ground. Needless to say you live and learn and the back garden looks real spiffy compared to the front. 

I couldn't move the hammock as it weighs a ton so that will be Pio's little patch to do when he gets in but otherwise, my garden looks very neat and clean at the moment. This would be a good thing but it means that the cleaner and neater the garden the more rubbish I have piled around the side of the house that I have to load into a bakkie and take to the dump ... sigh ... the grass was so long there is easily three bin bags worth of cuttings that need to be binned. Joy of joys.

Anyway, I have also planted tomatoes and my first plant has tomatoes on but am not sure if they're going to be useable; time will tell. I have planted my other 4 tomato plants out so am waiting to see if they take and grow. I also planted my lettuces out so am praying they are going to take and grow and that means I won't have to buy lettuce for the whole of December! 

Yesterday I put more seeds in; onions, spring onions, more lettuce and gem squash. I now have to wait ten days and see if they grow; should be interesting! Today I want to plant carrots, lettuces and herbs but I am trying to find the ideal spot for them. The herbs will best grow in pots but I don't have any pots so should probably go buy more. 

I also want to start growing from cuttings out of the garden; the plants in the garden are just phenomenal so want to get some hormone powder and start cutting and growing, either to sell or in case we move and then I can start a new garden wherever we go to with plants from here! Not at all cheeky lol. 

Right, am off to water all my seedlings and see if my tomatoes have survived being planted out!

Halloween

 Is on its rather grim way and as here in Namibia any excuse is used to party, here comes another one. I do like dress-up though (everyone is a child inside) and so really think that I would like to take part this year. 

History states that the celebration of Halloween has been derived from a number of ancient festivals, such as the Irish Samhain, Roman feat of Pomona, or the festival of the dead, Parantalia. It is a celebration of the end of the Summer months and the beginning of the dark Winter; laying in stores for the cold months to come, and dousing all fires apart from the celebratory bonfires, from which the home hearth's were again lit after. 

This alone means that surely here in Africa where our seasons are reversed we shouldn't be celebrating this holiday, and if we wanted to, it should be at the end of summer and not the beginning - but who knows!

The belief is that on this particular night of the year, the curtains between the mortal world and the world of the dead are much thinner and the spirits can pass through to our realm, causing whatever havoc they may be able to if they so chose. The practice of wearing masks was thought to ward off the evil spirits and prevent them from doing any harm to the villagers and their homes.

The act of dressing up and going door to door begging for sweets and treats seems to have originated from something called "souling", a medieval act of beggars going door to door on Hallowmas (November 1st) receiving food in return for prayers for the dead. 

So all in all it is a rather grim day, and reminds me of the Crow movies, but there you go, dress up we shall and see if we can win any prizes for being the most creative. It's a far cry from the real significance behind Halloween and All Saints and All Souls Day.

Dentistry ...

For many years now I have been meaning to go have braces put in and to correct my awful teeth. I started in England and then got scared and backed off, and then ignored it, but every time I see a photo of myself I freak and so today bit the bullet and off I went to the dentist. 

Now, I was firstly not impressed as he double-books patients so at 8:45am he was already running 20 minutes late. This gave me the time to peruse his treatment room, which only disgusted me further as it was filthy and there was even blood on the cupboard bin and the whole place looked like it hadn't seen a cloth and detergent in months. Me with my freaky OCD doesn't cope with stuff like this, and it is even worse as this isn't just somewhere you can sit and walk away from, they will be sticking things in my mouth and if they can't clean their rooms will they even be able to clean their equipment??? Also their equipment looks as if it is about 200 years old apart from the x-ray machine. 

So do you go to another dentist and pay much more or do you bite the bullet and deal with the dirt???

The dentist says that my jaw has grown wrong and not developed correctly, so the chances of correcting this are slim and there could be many side-effects that could damage my teeth and roots permanently. I also may have to go to Cape Town for an operation to have my jaw broken and shifted forward which will correct the overbite but that will be at the end of the treatment. My top jaw has also developed incorrectly, and so is much narrower - that will be corrected by shifting my teeth on top sideways to widen it slowly. 

He took an impression made from this gooey stuff that he said tastes like ice-cream (my ass) which hurt like hell and x-rays, and I need to go back on Saturday to find out how it will work and what the cost will be. He also says that NHP probably won't pay it at all and the plan that we have is crap but once he has given me all the paperwork then I can go to them and see what they say.

So we shall see what the outcome on Saturday is, but if I don't do it now then I guess I never will and I hate my teeth with a passion, they are a real embarrassment to me and would love to have them fixed so that I can smile without being self-conscious or criticizing every photo that I see. Pio seems to think that I should get a second opinion so that will have to be done as well - yippee!

Here goes nothing! I am debating whether I will have the courage to go through with it or run like hell lol.